Does “too much” order give you goosebumps?

Let me tell you a funny story about my uncle Sam.

So, my uncle has been living the bachelor life for years, and his house shows it.

One day I visited him.

While he was out buying groceries, I thought I’d do him a favor and put his kitchen in perfect order.

His kitchen looked like it just came back from a war.

Potato peels left on the counter for days. Greasy pans so dry I almost threw them away. No clean dishes in sight.

After an hour of hard work, the place was spotless.

Empty cans were gone, dishes in the dishwasher and drawers perfectly organized. I was so proud, I couldn’t wait to see his face!

Indeed, he was surprised. But not in a pleasant way at all.

“Jesus, Iv, what did you do to my kitchen?? It’s super empty. Where is everything? I can’t find my stuff anymore! Please, never clean my kitchen again.”

Not exactly the thank-you I was expecting.

Ugh…What happened here?

Why some people struggle with order and routines

There are so many apps out there promising to fix your bad habits, boost productivity, and help you stick to a healthy routine.

But let’s be real-most people still struggle with routines.

And that’s a problem, because routine is what builds discipline.

If you lack discipline, it doesn’t matter how smart or talented you are, you won’t get far. (See how to get everything you want here). Here’s the interesting part though: some people don’t fail at routines because they’re lazy or lack willpower.

For some people, order actually causes anxiety.

Why does that happen?

Order and the Psychological Fear of Death

Here’s something wild I learned from behavioral psychology experiments: the reason some people crave order is actually linked to the fear of death!

Sounds heavy, I know. But stay with me.

Subconsciously, people who need order associate chaos with death.

Chaos feels like the unknown, something we can’t control or understand. And death is the ultimate unknown. So to protect themselves, these people keep putting everything in neat boxes, cleaning, organizing, structuring their lives. It gives them a sense of safety.

For the exact same reason, the other group of people – those who thrive in chaos, feel good being messy!

They see it the opposite way. For them, too much order feels like death. Stillness. The end. They subconsciously link chaos with movement, energy, life. That’s why messy environments don’t bother them, they actually feel more alive in that space!

So if you’ve ever wondered why routines feel suffocating, or why order stresses you out, now you know: your brain is linking it to something way bigger.

How Lack of Routine Prevents You From Reaching Your Goals

So, let’s say you’ve made a big decision: you’re finally going to change your life and go after your dreams.

Step one? Get rid of the bad habits.

They drain your energy more than you realise, and they’ll keep pulling you back every time you try to move forward. (And if smoking is one of them, check out this super simple guide on quitting: How to quit smoking for good.)

Step two? Get clear on the exact life you want.

Picture it. Then figure out what daily actions will get you there, and commit to doing them over and over until you reach your goal.

Sounds simple, right?

Here’s the catch: persistance is built around routines. And if you have anxiety, routines can feel like a trap.

See, building a habit is all about repetition. Do it long enough and your brain starts doing it on autopilot. But if consistency makes you anxious, progress becomes nearly impossible.

Here’s how it usually plays out:

You start strong. Maybe it’s the gym, a new diet, a project – doesn’t matter what. At first, the novelty excites you. You feel proud, motivated, unstoppable.

On a deeper level, you feel a little bit anxious, but not so much yet, because the novelty excites you. You feel accomplished and proud of yourself.

But then the shine wears off. The routine starts to feel heavy. Obligations pile up.

Suddenly, life feels dull and suffocating. Mood swings creep in. (This is exactly why some people get “random” depression for no reason – see my article on that if it sounds familiar: Why you suddenly get depressed for no apparent reason.)

And here’s the frustrating part: even though it was YOUR idea to build this routine, it starts to feel like a prison. You crave freedom.

So you rebel.

Maybe you:

• skip your secret project work and spend the whole day gaming on the couch
• demolish a family-sized pizza after promising yourself you’d strictly stick to your diet
• stop going to dance classes even though you paid for the whole year

This isn’t laziness. It’s anxiety.

Your brain is fighting the order you tried to create.

How to Overcome Anxiety While Still Maintaining a Routine

Good news: there’s a way around your anxiety.

I’m going to give you a golden formula – how to keep moving toward your goals without letting anxiety crush your productivity.

If routines make you feel trapped, this will be a game-changer.

Check out my guide on How to keep a healthy routine when it gives you anxiety to learn how to be productive AND still enjoy freedom and spontaneity.

Sounds impossible?

Don’t worry. Once you see the steps, you’ll realise it’s actually much easier than you think.

You can also dive deeper into:

What exactly causes you to feel anxious

How video games might make your anxiety go away

The complete guide on how to achieve all of your dreams

TheThinkAbout is a website based on psychology in practice and experience.

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